‘Forty-something’ husband

Love is an interesting thing. You often hear how hard it can be.

While scrolling through social media, I heard a divorce attorney say recently that if you are lucky enough to find someone that you actually love and end up marrying that you’ve hit the lottery. If you like the person after being married to them, that’s even more of a jackpot. He said for the people that are fortunate enough to have found their person and still enjoy their time with them more than when they aren’t around then that is something worth protecting.

I was fortunate enough to find my person. Tim is a ‘forty-something’ year-old that also has a column for The Reporter that you might be familiar with. If you are, you already know that the first thing that drew me to him was his sense of humor.

He is a bit older than me – about nine years. It rarely comes up, but every now and then we will reference what we were doing when a specific event happened. I remember when we were talking about 9/11, I mentioned being in grade school and he was in college. We both just looked at each other and laughed. I also remember when we went to his high school reunion and everyone seemed old.

Tim is not someone who likes attention. He always shows up for people and makes everyone else a priority over himself. He is the funniest person I know. He makes me laugh every single day. Tim has never stopped dating me. He puts our marriage first and never lets anything get in the way of us. Tim makes a point to buy me flowers and connect. He makes an effort to take an interest in things that are important to me.

Tim is the best dad. His children are his life, and anyone who knows our kids knows what an amazing dad he is to both of them.

Nobody can cook quite like my husband. Not only is it a huge luxury having someone who cooks well, he truly enjoys it. It’s a win/win because that means I don’t have to cook much myself!

On our first date, we had gone to dinner and as we walked back to the car, he asked if I wanted to go to Moe & Johnny’s for a drink and I was so excited because I really liked him and thought he must be having fun if he wanted to keep the date going. I remember our first kiss – it was a disaster! I thought he was going to kiss me goodnight and like a true gentleman, he thought I was giving him a hug. It was a mismatched hug/kiss that we still laugh about today.

As we celebrate 15 years together this September, I want to take this opportunity to tell him how much I love him and also if you haven’t checked out his column for The Reporter, you should! I’m biased, but he really is very funny. I remember when I first pitched the idea of him having a column to Stu, The Reporter Publisher, he was a bit hesitant and wanted an idea of what he had to offer. It didn’t take long for him to read it and agree that he is funny and very talented.

I see the jokes online that being an adult is just deciding what to do with the pack of beef or chicken for the rest of your life. There is nobody else I would rather decide it with than him. If there is one thing I got right in my life, it’s the person I married. My only regret with him is the noise he makes when he chews pizza. I can’t handle it. Besides that, I love him very much.

“If you truly love someone, you love them twice. The first time, it’s all about attraction, their smile, voice, and presence. But slowly, the curtain lifts. You see their scars, insecurities, mood swings, trauma. It’s no longer perfect. It’s real. And if you can still love them, without filters, that’s the love of understanding. The kind that stays. The kind that grows.”

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Megan Rathz is a wife, mother, and teacher. She says everything she has ever learned in life came from her Master Gardener mother.