The most undervalued job I’ve ever witnessed

By DEVIN NORRICK
Guest Columnist

I spend my days as an attorney in Hamilton and Madison Counties with Adler Attorneys. Most weeks I work 50 hours or more by choice. My work is demanding – family law, Department of Child Services cases, criminal defense, civil litigation, contested estates, trusts, and property disputes. The stakes are high, the decisions matter, and the mental load is significant.

For a long time, I believed that my career was one of the most demanding jobs a person could have. Then our daughter was born.

Over the past several days, I’ve been home helping my wife recover while caring for our newborn and our almost two-year-old son. Those few days have completely changed my perspective on one of the most overlooked jobs in our society: being a stay-at-home parent.

Every morning seems to begin with a race against the clock. Before lunch I’ve already run multiple errands, swept and mopped the house, washed load after load of laundry, cleaned dishes more times than I can count, completed farm chores, helped care for our son, and tried to support my wife as she recovers from childbirth only a few days before.

And then the afternoon begins. There is always another diaper to change. Another meal to prepare. Another mess to clean. Another crying child to calm. Another bedtime routine to navigate. Another night interrupted by a crying newborn. There are no coffee breaks. No lunch hour. No quiet office. No clocking out at five o’clock. The work simply continues.

As I’ve experienced this firsthand, I’ve come to appreciate something I don’t think our culture recognizes nearly enough: stay-at-home parents are performing work that is physically exhausting, emotionally demanding, mentally draining, and incredibly valuable.

Studies have attempted to assign a dollar value to this work: $150,000 a year or more. I honestly believe that misses the point. You simply cannot place a price tag on raising children, nurturing them, comforting them, teaching them, and giving them the consistency they need during their earliest years.

What struck me even more wasn’t just the workload. It was the sacrifice. The morning before writing this, I realized my wife had been awake feeding our daughter at 1 a.m., 3:30 a.m., and again at 5:30 a.m. while I slept through the night. She wasn’t complaining. She was simply doing what mothers do every single day. She is only days removed from giving birth, yet she continues putting the needs of our children ahead of her own comfort and rest.

That kind of sacrifice deserves recognition.

Another realization I’ve had during this time is how much children simply want your presence. When our son was born a couple of years ago, I only had three days at home before returning to work. This time, thanks to the support of Adler Attorneys, I’ve been able to take additional time away from the office. I am deeply grateful for that opportunity.

I’ve watched my son light up simply because Dad is home. I’ve seen how naturally he turns to his mother throughout the day – for comfort, for guidance, for reassurance. I’ve witnessed the bond that develops when a parent is consistently present during the ordinary moments of life. Those moments matter.

None of this is intended as criticism of families where both parents work. For many households, that’s not a choice – it’s a necessity. Working parents love their children just as deeply and make extraordinary sacrifices of their own.

But I do believe we should stop undervaluing those who devote themselves full-time to raising children. Being a stay-at-home parent isn’t “not working.” It’s working all day. It’s sacrificing sleep, personal time, career advancement, and often adult conversation. And it’s doing all of that because you believe your children are worth it.

The longer I’ve been home, the more convinced I’ve become that one of the greatest gifts we can give children is our time. Whether that’s a mother staying home, a father staying home, flexible work schedules, or simply making intentional choices to be present, children benefit when loving adults invest deeply in their lives.

So today I’d simply ask you to do one thing. If your spouse is a stay-at-home parent, tell them thank you. Give them a hug. Recognize the countless things they do that often go unseen.

Because after just a few days of walking in those shoes, I can say with complete confidence that stay-at-home parents aren’t underworked. They’re undervalued. And in my opinion, they are among the true heroes of everyday life.

Devin T. Norrick is an attorney at Adler Attorneys in Noblesville and Anderson.