Top 10 ponderings

It’s a quiet Christmas morning here in Tampa. It’s 6:00 and Chuck is still sleeping. Alex, our goldendoodle granddog, is nestled close to my feet.

Alex is spending a few days with us while his family is in Wyoming. They might be having some “wild and scary” adventures on the slopes and trails in Jackson Hole. There may be a column about them. It’s Emily’s story to tell. The story almost gave her mother a come-apart.

I have many ponderings this morning as I sit and drink my coffee.

2025 has been quite the emotional year. If I’m being honest, I’m ready for it to be over. It’s been a rough year.

As I sit here in Chuck’s chair, candles flickering and tucked under a comfy throw, my mind is wandering around the things I learned in 2025. Before the day gets going into full-on Christmas Day mode, I’m writing this column.

Our columnist had a helper as she composed her thoughts this week. (Photo provided)

Things I learned in 2025

No. 10: We’re all just doing our best to figure out how to live our best lives. The older I get, the “best” looks different. It goes at a slower pace. I’ve become more of a noticer. You have to slow down to really notice what is special about every day. In 2026, at the end of every day, I plan to write down one thing I “noticed” that was good. On some days, there will be more than one. Most will be simple things.

No. 9: Every one of us shows love differently. We need to learn to allow our family and friends the grace to do so. Why do we complicate relationships with how we want to be loved? Let them love us in the ways they know how. Period.

No. 8: Slather grace over everyone you love. Don’t allow your expectations to paint an unrealistic picture of your relationships. Love is shown and felt differently by everyone. Slathered grace is a beautiful thing. This might blend into No. 9 a bit.

No. 7: Spending time with those you love is the greatest gift of all. Time is a hugger of the heart. An invitation is truly a gift. It tells others you value their presence in your life.

No. 6: Taking a walk relaxes your mind and lets you step away from the demands of the day and put things into the proper perspective. Walking is both mental and physical therapy. Don’t we all need a little therapy? Some of us … a lot.

No. 5: Your soul needs music. When you listen, it opens the heart to joy. When you sing, it swings open the door to more joy. You may sing off-key, but your heart doesn’t care.

No. 4: Let people think what they think and do what they do. You must decide to … Let them. You cannot change them. Please don’t let their issues ruin your day (or your life). Don’t allow their grouchiness or ugliness to puke all over you. Verbal puke is the worst. The philosophy of “Let Them” is life-changing.

No. 3: Walking away from a conversation without engaging in an argument is sometimes not only the best thing to do, but it also makes the loudest statement. Walking away is like putting an exclamation point on your thoughts. They know.

No. 2: Quiet love speaks volumes. When your husband makes you a cup of coffee and knows exactly how you like it. Sending a text that says … Have I told you lately? Sitting across from your husband and quietly praying for him while he watches the third football game of the day. I call these things quiet slatherings of love.

No. 1: Kindness matters. In a world where loud chaos and pure meanness are the news of the day, kindness matters. Look for the kind words of people. Look for the gestures of kindness that are shown every day. Look for ways to be kind. Your heart, as well as the people you encounter, will thank you. Don’t allow the loud voices to make you mean. Be nice to the ugly, but don’t let their ugliness make you ugly. Pretty is as pretty does is something my mother taught me. Ugly is as ugly does is also true. In a world full of ugly … be pretty. Nothing will ever be as pretty as kindness.

Those are my Top 10 ponderings of 2025. Thank you for reading my column each week.  I wish you a Happy, Kind, and Blessed New Year.

Janet Hart Leonard can be contacted at janethartleonard@gmail.com or followed on Facebook or Instagram (@janethartleonard). She is the recipient of the Reporter’s Spring 2025 Ink-Stained Wretch award. Visit janethartleonard.com.