There my burdened soul found liberty.
No, it wasn’t at Calvary, but it was at the altar of a small country church. My friend, Georgia Marshall, the preacher’s wife, had invited me to speak to the women of the church. Before I spoke, we were given time to pray. As the women scattered to various pews in the sanctuary to spend time with God, I made my way to the altar … to leave my burdens with the Lord.
As I knelt to pray, I was reminded that I was raised to believe the altar was a sacred place. A place where I could have a little talk with my heavenly father.
I whisper, “Lord, life is hard. So many are hurting. I’m one of them.” I hear the words in my heart, “Do you trust me with your doubts?” The tears find their way to my eyes and leak down my cheeks.
I had faith but I also had doubts. Doubts that I would live long enough to see some hurts ever be healed. Doubts that some things would ever change. Doubts that God would intervene in situations over which I had no control. Doubts hovered over my circumstances. They clouded my hope.
I needed to catch a glimpse of hope. It was then I saw, in my mind, a picture of Jesus hanging on the cross. It was for my doubts that he hung on the cross and died.
Photo provided
It was at that altar I was given new insight. My focus turned from my doubts and found its way to the man who gave his life so that I could live and live life abundantly. My hope was in the man that hung on the cross. It was that hope that allowed my heart to find joy. Because of the cross. Because of the man that hung there. Because that man died for my sins and … he died for my doubts.
But – and oh, how I love the word BUT – Christ arose from the grave! Oh, the joy that was found on that third day. Forever there would be hope. Hope for every doubt. Hope for every fear. Hope for every heartache.
All those Bible verses I learned as a child were brought to that altar. They were promises upon which I had built my faith and my life. They weren’t just memorized in my head but also in my heart.
It was at that altar I was reminded of who God had been in my life. He had shown up in the midst of my doubts before. The doubts I had that afternoon were left there.
There will be more tears. There will be more doubts. But the altar will always be there. It may not be the altar in that little country church, but whenever I spend time with God, I come to the altar. Whether it be at my kitchen table while I drink my coffee, in my car while I take a drive, or on a walk along the river that winds its way through my hometown, God will be waiting for me to bring my hurts, my doubts, and my hopes to Him.
I just need to find my way to the altar.
My mother would sing, “Just a little talk with Jesus makes it right.” I miss that alto voice. I miss her wisdom. Oh, what a legacy she left. I watched her, many a time, leave her tears at the altar. I think she left her doubts there, too. She would sing, “Take your burdens to the Lord and leave them there.” Leave them there.
What I need to tell you is that my mother attended that same little country church in the early 1950s. Her tears were left on that altar. She prayed for a child at that altar.
And now, some 70 years later, that answer to her prayers was praying at that altar. Oh, Victory Chapel Church, thank you for having an altar where a hurting soul can bring her burdens to the Lord and … leave them there.
Playlist: “When God Seems So Near” by Gaither Music
Janet Hart Leonard can be contacted at janethartleonard@gmail.com or followed on Facebook or Instagram (@janethartleonard). Visit janethartleonard.com.