I cannot count the number of times someone has come to me after becoming injured and apologized or expressed respect for my life with a disability.
Most of the time, they have an injury that will heal in time and will not live with a permanent disability. It does not take much to take someone’s abilities away.
Living without something, like strength, causes me to see things differently. The way I view the world is quite different from many people in my life. That is in no way a brag. I believe most who know me get that.
Living physically hindered has a direct effect on my gratitude meter. I have had and lost so much physically. Several times a day, I say a prayer of gratitude thanking God for the abilities I still have, which are abundant.
My disabilities are also abundant. What I choose to focus on has an enormous impact on my life.
I often wonder what my life will look like in a year or two or beyond. Will I be walking at all? Time will tell. I appreciate walking, even though it is one of the hardest things I do.
Most of the time when someone comes to me after they’ve been injured, they are speaking in a very apologetic manner. They are remorseful that they never took the time to really think what life would be like if they lost certain abilities.
They say things like “I had no idea even the little things are so challenging and deplete energy so quickly.” They are surprised at the lack of public accessibility. They are shocked at both the dismissive nature of strangers, and the kindness of strangers.
In speaking with a friend recently, I asked him about his change in perspective a few months ago after a significant injury that left him non-weightbearing on one foot. I asked him if he would share specifics about how living temporarily disabled changed his perspective going forward after healing from his injury.
He recalled a time when he went to fill a gas can so his brother could mow his lawn for him. He filled the can and then realized that he could not get it in the car as he was non-weightbearing and on crutches. He remembered it felt impossible.
Luckily, a kind stranger noticed his struggle and offered to load the gas can into his car. He mentioned that after getting in the car, he was emotional over the kindness of that stranger.
He learned a lot in that one moment of the importance of slowing down and noticing people, and how a single act of kindness can have lasting effects.
He also recalled being more aware of accessible parking, and how he had never really noticed all the barriers that those with disabilities face daily.
He spoke candidly about how his empathy has improved for others because of his temporary life-altering time. He has a newfound joy of again being able to walk/jog to various places along the cross-country course to watch his three children run.
His experience helped shift his perspective and he is more inclined to view everyday life through the lens of gratitude. I really appreciate the vulnerability he tapped into to share all of this with me, and you!
Don’t wait until you or someone you care about faces physical challenges to notice where there could be improvements to help those who live with disabilities.
Offer to lend a helping hand when you see someone struggling.
Those small acts of kindness are a truly life changing and stick to the soul.
Until next time …
Amy Shinneman is a former National Ambassador for the Muscular Dystrophy Association, disability blogger, freelance writer, wife, and mom of two boys. You can find her blog at humblycourageous.com and reach her on Instagram @ashinneman.