By JANET HART LEONARD
From the Hart
Life is not complicated unless it is made complicated by circumstances you cannot control … Hello, Customer Service.
We are experiencing a large volume of calls; your wait time may be longer than normal. (Define “normal.”)
Please listen carefully as our menu choices have recently changed. (Same choices I have had for the past several years.)
Your issues may be due to service that was recently done in your area to enhance your viewing pleasure. (Define “enhance.”)
Your call is important to us, please hold for the next available advocate to assist you. (Define “important.”)
Forty-five minutes on Hold when I was in Tampa and Chuck was in Noblesville struggling with our cable TV issues. (I might add this was during the Purdue football game.) Two hours later … mission accomplished. I was able to talk with our cable provider/representative all the while texting Chuck what was needed to do to restore our cable. The issue? It’s complicated.
As I write this week’s column, I am on Hold with my Medicare benefits/catalog people. It seems that to register with the new catalog, I need a 17-digit number that I don’t have because they changed catalogs and my number has been deactivated. Kinda like being up a creek without a paddle. I’m glad I’m not having a medical emergency.
Recently, upon applying for COVID Death Funeral Benefits, I found out each document must have my application number and my name and the last four digits of my social security number. AFTER a trip to get a copy of the bill for my mother’s funeral and insurance information, I was then informed they needed the signature of the funeral home director. Back to the funeral home. While I was there, they faxed the information to FEMA. I was told the fax would reach them in approximately 14 days … 14 DAYS! Seriously?
After I got home from Tampa, this week I woke up to having no channel 13 WTHR. What? No Today Show? It seems they “enhanced” my service causing my cable to kick off channel 13. They rebooted my service and there was Jenna Bush. I had missed the explanation as to why Hoda was missing. Good Morning, Janet!
Back to my still being on Hold with my catalog customer service.
I have to wonder who picks the music that is playing while I am on Hold. Obviously, they have never listened to it for almost an hour … and still waiting. The band plays on.
Finally, I get an advocate to answer. I am immediately sent to take a survey. No way to get back to advocate. I call again.
One hour and nine minutes later, I am being helped. The young man is so patient with me as he guides me to where I need to go to order my $40 in health products at no charge. I ask/beg him to please stay with me as though he is my lifeline.
The catalog gave an incorrect website. Nowhere in the instructions in the catalog is it mentioned that you must use Chrome and not Safari as your browser to get to the correct website when you are finally given the address to the correct website. The nice man apologizes. He stays with me until I am able to register … without the 17-digit number.
I have him on speaker so Chuck can hear everything that is being said. Chuck watches my expressions. My looks speak volumes. I hold my tongue so the grouchiness isn’t heard in my voice.
I try so hard to be especially nice to the one person who has been looking forward to reassuring me of my importance. After an hour of being on Hold, my niceness is pretty much worn down to a prickly stubble. I remind myself that my advocate must encounter more than a few grouchy people, so I continue thanking him for his help.
Then I am asked, “Would you like to participate in a brief survey at the end of your phone call?” Trust me when I say they do not want my opinion; however, I give them my opinion. I make sure to give the nice man who helped me a 10/10.
When asked if I had any issues with the system, I have to be honest. I give them a 0/10. Then I am asked to tell them why. I leave a very nice, but definitely frustrated, message.
Let’s just say it has been quite the week with my frustration being 10/10. What is the word with which I have started the year? It’s complicated.
Contact Janet at janethartleonard@gmail.com. Find her on Facebook and Instagram. Her first book is nearing completion and hopefully will have a late summer book launch.