Unpacking luggage & guilt

All packed up and ready to go until a nasty virus said … not today, lady.

It was last Thursday around 2 a.m. when I woke up and realized the virus I had caught six days earlier had gripped my throat (laryngitis), ears, and chest, and had worn me down. I told Chuck, “Honey, I’m so sorry I can’t get on a plane and fly to Tampa.”

We were supposed to leave the house at 2:50 because our flight was at 5:30 a.m., and our grandson, Jake, was coming with us. I had to text him to say he would be going alone. He said, “No worries, Grandma, just get feeling better.” His mom, Angie, insisted on taking him to the airport, which let Chuck go back to bed. I was camped out on the sofa.

I disappointed Jake, Chuck, Emily, and her family. I was a no-show at my own party, as you can see … it was my birthday. Happy Birthday to me. The icing on the cake was that I now had pink eye.

I scheduled another trip to Med Check, where I was given an antibiotic, cough pills, and an ointment for my eye.

It was interesting at our house because Chuck couldn’t understand me due to severe laryngitis, and I couldn’t hear him. We found out neither of us was good at sign language or reading it. He thought my sign for water was a signal to turn up the TV volume.

The thing is, while I was terribly disappointed, I felt I had let down the people I love. We’d planned to celebrate not only my birthday but also Chuck’s and my son-in-law Drew’s. Chuck and Jake were going to golf, and Emily and I were going to do mother-daughter stuff.

I was on a no-fun staycation. Worse, I was on a guilt trip. I had caused all the people I love to change their plans and miss out on a family vacation, and it was my fault, or so I felt.

Photo provided by Janet Hart Leonard

As a recovering people-pleaser, I still struggle whenever I disappoint anyone. I couldn’t help getting really sick, but the guilt was still there.

I have no idea where I picked up this virus. At Med Check, they told me it was a particularly severe virus. They were correct in their diagnosis and in assessing how severe it was.

I was told it is a seven- to 10-day virus. I am on day 12.

Over the weekend, I got a text from fellow columnist Amy Shinneman. She had apparently come down with the same virus. The thing was, she had a 14-hour flight from Australia to catch. I couldn’t imagine feeling as bad as I did and having to be on a plane for 14 hours. I worried about her ears. She was worried, too. I prayed a lot for her and for her husband, Jamie, who was with her. They had just run the Australian Marathon, with Amy on her special bike and Jamie running and pushing her. They are quite the team.

What our readers of the Hamilton Country Reporter may not know is that Amy, along with Amy Shankland and Sharon McMahon, are dear friends, not just fellow columnists. We are known as the Word Warriors.

So here I am at home, and hopefully I will be better soon and over my guilt trip. Now I just need to unpack my suitcase.

Janet Hart Leonard can be contacted at janethartleonard@gmail.com or followed on Facebook or Instagram (@janethartleonard). She is the recipient of the Reporter’s Spring 2025 Ink-Stained Wretch award. Visit janethartleonard.com. You can purchase her book “When the Hart Speaks” at amazon.com/dp/B0B1C7QKF6.