By KEN KLINGENMEIER
A Seat on the Aisle
Very often lately when friends ask me how I’m doing, I tell them, “Just ridin’ the Geezer Train.” Reactions vary from laughs to mildly sorrowful ‘awws’ to being startled and not saying anything. Old folks can do that – startle people with something they say without intending ever to do so.
The fact is it is a fairly true statement. The run up to becoming 75 on Oct. 9 was very much a ride through various stations of endings, changes, happinesses, enlightenments, reassessments, and nonsense.
It occurs to me that 75 years is a LONG TIME, 55 years of which have been as an adult with all the delights and struggles which that lengthy stage brings. Now it is time to be a certified ‘old man’ (see: geezer) and so to celebrate this lofty plateau I thought I’d reflect on just what that means to me.
Primarily, becoming 75 means I am totally lucky to still be walking the face of the earth – or at least the face of Indianapolis; many have not had the good fortune to be here at this age. It’s a wonderful gift. One learns along the way that health is all important. That doesn’t mean I haven’t had problems to endure – but nothing has put me down, yet, and I am happy to be able to say that my mind still operates at an acceptable level and my body is very mostly okay.
Part of the aging process is change, of course – and change, of course. I have voluntarily left behind the pleasure of creating theatre moments, as a director and as a performer. This is a deeper loss than even I expected, as it is not just the loss of the creativity process, it is more so the loss of contact with the wonderful community of people who are a part of theatre arts in this area. People are the essence of what theatre gives to its practitioners. Losing that has left a rather large chasm. The Geezer Train doesn’t stop at that station any more. Luckily, I have great memories of my 40-plus years of being involved in theatre. And many pictures to jog those memories.
The loss of contact with so many friends makes for a lonelier existence. Part of aging can be isolation. But I’m not really alone – my everyday companion is my wonderful wife, Donna (Mrs. K to my frequent readers). She is a perfect partner, a light in my life, sharing these late years with me. Aging together is another bonus I am grateful for. It wouldn’t be the same without her company and wisdom and aid. With Donna by my side, my troubles are few.
As we age, we need to find new activities to take the place of the old ones we leave behind. To replace the creative process of stagework, I have tried writing. Since I started my blog 12 or 13 years ago, I have learned where most of the keys are on my laptop keyboard, though hitting the correct ones has started to be a problem.
After a few short bursts of production, with a memoir and a story or two, I wrote a novella entitled Soul Stories, setting the tale in the afterlife, thereby making any particulars about the subject whatever I wanted them to be. It was an enjoyable endeavor – surprisingly very much akin to improvisation as the characters unspooled the story. The manuscript sits now on a thumb-drive, ready to be edited further. I attempted tempting a few publishers with my wares, but not surprisingly I was met with some form rejections. I may try again. (I also have a few ideas for a play I’d like to write.)
Aging has kept me from visiting family in other cities. Since the COVID era and with some intense back and leg problems we both have been going through, Donna and I have ceased traveling. Air travel could be a nightmare with long airport walks, long lines, tight seating and all the other trials of flying. I used to love taking flights, but the airlines have made it very difficult to enjoy them now.
Car travel remains a possibility, but with family in Buffalo (nine hours away), Augusta (12 hours), Houston (18 hours), and Las Vegas (days and days) road trips are either impractical or a challenge. We hope to make some visits soon, but I know traveling will not be what it once was – and the Geezer Train doesn’t go there, unfortunately.
One very real aspect of getting older is the loss of family and friends at a quickened pace as they themselves age. I believe that is the saddest part. It seems we are – all of us – running out of time.
Also of note is a sharp awareness of my own mortality. It has always lurked in the corner, but with far more years behind me than ahead of me, I have a more acute realization that I am not always going to be here. In fact, it may be sooner than later … who knows? To put things in perspective, I started thinking of my turning 75 as entering the fourth quarter of my game – 25 years to the quarter. Overtime is possible but rare. I have no idea what my over/under is.
As far as I can recall, loss of memory is one of those issues that is always related to getting older – and my powers of recall have certainly been affected. I often walk into a room forgetting what my reason was for going there. (The bathroom is an exception.) Also, I may be reading or surfing online sometimes and come across a topic I wish to explore further and by the time I open a new browser tab moments later and settle into the search bar, I have completely lost any idea of what I hoped to study. I think the Geezer Train somehow negates the Train of Thought.
Most political interest has left me, and it’s probably a good thing. As crazy and mendacious as it all is now, I cannot fathom taking either side very seriously. As I age, I have become aware that not much that they ever do in Washington (or in the Statehouse) ripples out to affect me directly anyway, so why lose sleep over it?
Finally, I happily note that reaching the age of 75 puts me on track for even more birthdays – more new changes, more valuable time to spend with my wife and family, more forgetfulness, more miles on the Geezer Train. Here’s to longevity – which seems to be quite the in-fashion thing these days of medical miracles and discoveries.
So – all aboard and onward … to 80 please!