I was recently watching a video of a man who was talking about dwelling in a positive mindset. His thoughts were, if you can let your mind rest in the positive instead of a negative space, life will be much brighter.
It is funny how we can hear things hundreds of times and something does not click, but when we hear it at just the right time with the right delivery, it finally makes sense.
I have been encouraged to stop dwelling on the negative all throughout my lifetime.
It was the way he spoke about overthinking is what changed the way I viewed my situation. The way he spoke about where we allow our mind to rest.
I tend to overthink the worst outcomes of any given situation. Anyone else? I have been this way for as long as I can remember.
He suggested instead of overthinking all the worst-case scenarios, to ruminate on the best-case scenarios. Overthink the positives. Think of the best possible outcome for any given situation. Eventually your brain will relearn the new pattern.
I am not big on setting a ton of new goals each year. I feel like a continuation of good habits is the best way for me to approach a new year. I like to build off my foundation, slowly incorporating things that improve my life.
This sets me up for better success than setting dozens of lofty goals and then finding myself disappointed when I review them at the end of the year. I also feel like at any time during the year, new goals or desires can be set. There are no rules.
While I have slowly integrated viewing my disability through a positive lens, I can still let my mind rest in a more negative mindset and certainly struggle with catastrophic thinking. I would really like to work to continue to improve that.
I feel that the steps I have taken to learn accept myself, just as I am, not viewing my life as a badly dealt hand, have been so transformative for me. It is not easy, but it is rewarding.
Part of being able to do that is by not letting myself get upset at all the minuscule things each day that are hard or just don’t work out, physically speaking.
For instance, it is getting harder to put on a pair of pants. My balance is not as good, and it is hard for me to lift my leg from a sitting position into a pair of pants. It is exhausting. It is easy to let that set the tone of frustration for my day. Then it snowballs into a series of frustrations throughout my entire day.
I have made great progress towards letting those micro frustrations go. That has really made a difference in my life. I am far less angry than I used to be, and I believe that change has had a lot to do with that. It is not perfect and never will be, but I find that most of the time, this is the case.
All that to say, I have proved to myself that I can make positive mental changes. I believe that I can learn to retrain my mindset to rest in the positives. Resting in the space of looking towards the best-case scenario.
I do not have any idea how long it will take me to learn to rest in the positive, but it is exciting for me to believe that I can get to that place. I know the process will not be perfect, and it will take time. It takes diligence.
In the short amount of time that I have been trying it, it has felt very foreign. However, each time it does get a little easier.
Here is to me thinking that a year from now, I will have strengthened my foundation and bettered my life in a way that serves me well.
Until next time …
Amy Shinneman is a former National Ambassador for the Muscular Dystrophy Association, disability blogger, freelance writer, wife, and mom of two boys. She is the recipient of the Reporter’s Winter 2025 Ink-Stained Wretch award. You can find her blog at humblycourageous.com and reach her on Instagram @ashinneman.