Sandwiched
Okay, y’all, I think it’s time for some humor. Not that I think we’ve got all of the world’s problems solved (COVID-19, racism, murder hornets, etc.). But once in a while we just have to take a moment and laugh at ourselves. That’s exactly what I’ve been doing this week.
I remember years ago listening to middle-aged people telling me how they did pretty much nothing and ended up with injuries. In my naïve youth, I found this stuff hard to believe, especially when one of my friends simply turned her neck a certain way and wound up in the ER with severe pain. Well, my friend has definitely been laughing at me lately!
My first incident happened almost three years ago while hoop dancing. For those of you not familiar with this exercise, it is basically dancing with a hula hoop. The hoop goes way beyond your waist for a variety of movements. It’s one of my favorite hobbies. For the most part, hoop dancing has only given me minor injuries such as bruising and the occasional fat lip.
Then one afternoon I did a move I’d done probably hundreds of times before, twisted my ankle, and fell into a heap on the floor. Apparently, I cried out so loud that people heard me from the floor above and came running down to see what was wrong.
Fortunately, it was only a sprain, but for the life of me I still can’t believe just a simple turn left me hobbling for weeks. I was unable to drive my stick shift or do other ordinary tasks. But incidents like these have only gotten worse.
I wrote last January about how I stood up one day from working on my computer to go to the dentist and my back instantly “froze up,” as I call it. Medically speaking, I experienced a back spasm. My back hadn’t been hurting that week. I hadn’t done anything strenuous. I just scooted my chair back and … stood up.
While chatting, or rather mumbling, with my chiropractor that afternoon, we determined the culprit was probably bad posture while working at my dining room table (take note all of you who are new to working from home). My back began to feel much better a few days later.
Then there was last Saturday morning. I was enjoying sleeping in, petting my dogs and happy to see a sunny day. I yawned, stretched, and instantly felt a sharp cramp in my right calf muscle. I yelped so loud the dogs sprang off my bed.
I massaged the cramp and didn’t think anything about it, but continued to feel the pain until last Wednesday. FIVE DAYS. All because I just stretched out in bed.
What amazes me is that I consider myself to be in fairly good shape for a woman about to turn 50. But it seems like no matter what you do, middle age is full of these fun “surprises.” So just be careful and watch your step … and your chair … and your bed…