By AMY SHANKLAND
Perfectly Imperfect
I think most newspaper columnists like to have one of these “odds and ends” columns – where we just share brief, multiple stories. Today is mine.
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Happy Heavenly Birthday, Mom! Yep, today’s the day. And I know my mama is doing well. Before she passed away, I asked her to show me that she’s all right through some sort of Lily of the valley sign.
“Make it unusual,” I asked. Well, she came through in two ways.
First, I’ve been able to smell our Lily of the valley while sitting on my back deck this year. Even though they’re at the front of my house, the scent this year is more powerful than ever. That’s never happened. Second, a dear friend surprised me Tuesday evening with Lily of the valley soap, essential oil, and notecards. I had to blink back the tears.
Thanks, Mom! I love you.
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New Column Title. I’ve given this tremendous thought, and I think the new column title fits me and this stage of life. At age 51, I’ve realized that even though my house, cars, pets, neighborhood, career, friends, and family aren’t perfect, they’re perfect for me. They all bring me such joy.
When my sister Vicky created a T-shirt with the saying “Perfectly Imperfect” on it, I knew I had to buy it. It’s become my favorite pajama shirt.
My column topic will shift more towards empty-nester subjects, although this summer we’re happy to have our son Jacob home from Ball State. And it will also focus on …
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Getting to Know My Biological Parents. Yep, I can finally share this with the world. I have written about how I was adopted, but until this time, I couldn’t tell many people that I located my biological parents seven years ago.
For some reason, my mother became extremely nervous whenever I brought up the topic of finding my biological family. Even when the records division of St. Joseph County shared some non-identifying information with me in 2009, she was unhappy.
I wanted to respect her feelings, but as a mom myself, the urge to find out more about my biological history grew stronger every year. I wanted my boys to know their heritage, see where some of their traits came from, and have good medical history information.
When I learned that the State of Ohio was opening up their adoption records in the spring of 2015, I knew I couldn’t wait any longer. I decided to get the information and not tell my mother.
It was so hard to keep everything a secret, especially as my search grew along with my love and respect for my parents. If only I could have told Mom how, with each new discovery on my journey, it helped me feel closer to her than ever.
I know so many people are touched through adoption, so I hope my future stories will help others in the months and years to come.
Thanks for being flexible, Readers! I look forward to this new direction.