Be Well
“How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”
– Winnie the Pooh
Dear Readers: This is a “rerun” of a column from one year ago, one on which several readers commented. The decision with which I was grappling is included at the end of the column.
I hesitated to select this subject as I usually write about fitness and nutrition, but I do believe that my topic this week addresses an issue that may be both familiar to many and which can affect our peace of mind. I have always been a “decision maker” but must confess that I have wrestled with this decision for many years. I am also usually not a “keeper of things” so this item noted here is unusual in that respect as well.
As a teenager I lost both parents in an automobile accident. I won’t spend time in this article discussing that in particular as it does not relate to the issue at hand. Those who know me or have read my column understand that this occurred many years ago.
However an item in my possession nearly 50 years is my mother’s purse. (Note: 2019 is the 50th anniversary.) It is not a designer purse, but is somewhat unique in that it is a hand-tooled leather purse which still holds objects which were there at the time she passed away. Now – I really do not intend to be maudlin about it, but I have kept it well protected and have always thought that someday I would like to actually use this purse for myself. Once in while (about every year this time) I take it out of its protective covering and give it a look, then I return it, saying “maybe next year.”
Let’s review the contents together: A blue wallet which still contains photos of my brother and of me, driver’s license, insurance card, nail file, Sears credit card, grocery list, etc. My plan, if it ever comes to fruition, is to empty the purse of its contents, of course, and then have it professionally cleaned and refurbished. It is in good condition and will be attractive when that is done. Although I am not one who believes that objects can attach us to those we have lost, it is a lovely piece that I believe she would want me to use. Carrying her purse would be a tribute to her perhaps and enjoyable for me as well. *See final decision.
My purpose in writing about this is two-fold. First of all while not all of us are mothers, all of us have mothers or mother figures. Many of you, like me, no longer have that person in your life. It is mentally and emotionally healthy to pay tribute to her, to share stories with other family members, and enjoy what you do have in your hearts and your mind to remember her fondly. Secondly, momentos can play a part in that as well. Your mental and physical well-being are inextricably linked; so stay healthy, be well and cherish those who are here and the memories of those who are not.
Will I finally carry my mother’s purse? I haven’t yet decided! Happy Mother’s Day!
Sharon McMahon, CNWC
*After much thought, consideration,and advice of a very good friend I have decided to display the purse contents in a “memory box” then have the purse cleaned and refurbished and include in that a photo, a special poem, and a short letter from me (to any future generations!) telling the reader some special memories I have of my mother. But first I plan to carry the purse – at least once!