By JANET HART LEONARD
From the Hart
Oh, the beauty that will be found when God holds your pen and paintbrush.
On February 25, 2007, I wrote…
I am never out of the touch or hold of God. It is my choice whether to acknowledge his presence and direction.
Father God, I pray I am always aware of even your most gentle of touches when you nudge me. Just knowing you go before me, into the unknown, reassures me that I can go forward with confidence.
Whenever I have no idea of why my journey has taken such a terrifying turn, I am reminded that you are already there … holding and guiding.
The journal in which this was written was buried in a stack of “to be read” books. I opened it up while doing some sorting and decluttering. I had no idea the words I would find, words that I had written 14 years ago.
The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O Lord, endures forever – do not abandon the works of your hands. Psalms 138:8 NIV
Wait! I needed to read that scripture … today! Scripture, I copied in my journal 14 years ago. I had no idea that I would ever be writing a book.
I had written down these words … I have a purpose.
I continued to read and as I did so, my heart did a few cartwheels.
Father God, help me to see you in my life, every day. Help me to remember you have made me for such a time as this. I am here at this time, in this place, to make a difference. Let me hear your voice over the noise in my life.
I read my own paraphrase of Psalms 139. I am fearfully and wonderfully made and that my days are ordained, written down before they will ever come to be.
In the past 14 years I learned that, in the midst of my fears, I have been given courage by the words of the scriptures. In the midst of my doubts, people came alongside to encourage me.
When I was consumed with worries over situations … there came help.
God didn’t always calm my storm, but he calmed me in the midst of my own personal tornadoes.
I stopped to feel the nudges. “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him.” Psalms 37:7 NIV
Have I mentioned that waiting, patiently, is not one of my strong points?
I had to make changes. Changes I was not happy about. I had to take my hands off the wheel. For someone who has control issues, these things were hard.
God held the pen that would tell my story. He held the paintbrush that would create a picture of a life I never knew would be possible. As the landscape and characters of my life changed, I changed. I was able to see the goodness of God in new ways.
Even in the hard times, God was good. Even when I told God that I was mad at Him, He never left my side. Even when I pitched a bit of a hissy fit about life not being fair, He brought people into my life that told me that I was human, and God understood my feelings.
Eventually, even when I did not get my way, life began to make sense. I learned a new sense of peace and contentment.
Was it God’s timing that I read the words in my journal 14 years after I wrote them? Absolutely. He knew I needed reminded.
He is still holding my pen and paintbrush. I have a story to tell, a story that He’s been writing for 66 years.