The parable of the hanky

Be Still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10

Stay with me on this story while I take you down a church aisle and into a pew to get to my thoughts this week.

I have trouble being still. I must have been born with a wiggle and worry gene.

My mother would say, “Janet Kay, be still,” as I squirmed in the church pew. She would make me a doll out of her hanky (handkerchief). That’s a talent I’ve never seen anyone else be able to do. I would watch her hands as she rolled the material, then folded it over, tucked, and pulled to make a head, arms, and legs. It was fascinating. I was focused and sat still.

Here’s the thing I am just now realizing. My mother taught me things growing up that she didn’t know would make such a difference many years later. She was trying to keep me from wiggling by giving me something else to focus on. This was an accidental lesson, as I call it.

What I focus on determines how I handle the issues and situations of my day. When I focus on what I can control and give what I can’t control over to God, I can be still. You might want to read that again. It has taken me a long time to realize the truth of those words. Oh, the beauty of remaining still when life gets a bit out of control.

I realize that the longer I focus on a worry, the larger it becomes. That worry follows me throughout my day. Yes, I will have a side of worry with my breakfast. I could walk faster if I didn’t have the weight of my worries on my shoulders.

Mom thought she was taking me to church to learn about God. She had no idea she was teaching me even more while sitting in the pew of that little Nazarene Church. I was learning who God could be in my life … if I allowed Him.

The lesson of focus in the parable of the hanky.

It is when I take my focus off the issues at hand and focus on who God is in my life that I see things differently. I can rest and be still more easily when I see things from that perspective.

Watching my mother fold that hanky took my mind off just how long the preacher was preaching. No one knows the hardness of oak until they have sat on it while a long-winded preacher tries to save them from the consequences of their sins. I wasn’t yet old enough to sin or understand what that meant.

Heaven forbid a wiggly, giggly three-year-old has to be taken out of the service just as the song leader sings the last stanza of “Softly and Tenderly.” The congregation might need to pray for that child and the immediate consequences of her inability to control her wiggles and giggles. I was fortunate to have a mother who would give me a “good talking to” rather than what most kids would receive.

Photo provided by Janet Hart Leonard

Back to that pew. I am back to learning the importance of not focusing on my worries but on what I can control. My mind, as well as my heart, can then learn to BE STILL.

The 23rd Psalm says, “He leads me beside still waters.” Still waters have no turbulence. Did you know that one of the definitions of the word STILL is that of having no turbulence? I find that interesting.

I am learning so much about the word, STILL. I love the feeling of being still, staying calm, and staying focused on the moment.

And that, my friends, is the word I have chosen as my 2024 WOTR (Word of the Year.) STILL

I’ll keep one of my mother’s hankies nearby as a reminder to be still. I love that Mom is still teaching me all those many years later. I’m so thankful for having her as my mother and for the lessons she taught me, even the accidental ones. I’m also thankful for padded pews in church.

Here’s to 2024 and its moments of stillness.

Happy New Year to all my readers!

Janet Hart Leonard can be contacted at janethartleonard@gmail.com or followed on Facebook or Instagram (@janethartleonard). Visit janethartleonard.com.