Teach your children well

“Janet Kay, always remember to use your voice to stand up for others and that your kindness matters.”

This past week, I could hear my dad saying those words loud and clear, echoing from my childhood.

Dad carried a lot of hurtful words from his childhood until he took his last breath. He taught me that the ugly words a child hears damage their heart.

The damage caused by those words changes how children feel about themselves. They are made to feel less than. When threatened, children live in constant fear.

So, where am I going with this? I read this week that some children in our community were being harassed and threatened. They are U.S. citizens, yet some children choose to attack them because they don’t look like the majority of the kids in their school. They might have a last name that sounds foreign. They were told that ICE was looking for them and they would be separated from their family.

This is cruel. We cannot become a community where any child must live in fear. We can do better. Let’s sit down and talk with our children (and grandchildren) and teach them to be kind and accepting. What if it were our child or grandchild hearing the threats and name-calling?

These children are grieving a life where they felt safe. They fear losing their parents. They live in a state of anxiousness and uncertainty. It hurts my heart to think these young ones are living like this. These include teenagers.

Why am I so passionate about this? My dad was hurt by cruel words as a child. He was raised during the Depression. He lived in the hills of Kentucky. Most of the families living there were poor. But … Dad’s family was the poorest of the poor. He had one shirt. It was proof that he was poor. The kids made fun of him.

The hurtful words of those kids stayed with him. He made sure his younger sisters had it better than him. He was quite a bit older. He was Santa all year long. He did not want them to endure the taunts and torments he had endured.

He would tell me that as a parent, I should be mindful of teaching my children that kindness matters and that they should never make fun of someone for being different.

He also said, “Janet Kay, always stand up for those who cannot stand up or speak for themselves.” Always have. Always will.  It was how I was raised and is a way to honor my dad.

Jim Hart, aka Dad, your legacy will live on as I use my voice to advocate for those who cannot speak up for themselves.

Parents, please have conversations that teach your children (especially teenagers) about kindness and standing up for those without a voice. Please watch what you say; your children are listening. Don’t let your words be the ammunition your child uses against another child. Don’t use the excuse that they are only words. Words can be used as weapons.

I’m sure that one shirt little Jimmy Hart wore had a few tears on it. Those tears and the words that caused them shaped Jim Hart into the man he became. He was the kindest and greatest man I ever knew. I was blessed to be his daughter.

I will forever use my voice to make a difference. I will use my voice to stand up for those who feel scared to use theirs.

Dad, I am still hearing your voice. I want you to know that you taught me well. I pray that others will understand your wisdom and teach their children well.

* * *

Janet Hart Leonard can be contacted at janethartleonard@gmail.com or followed on Facebook or Instagram (@janethartleonard). Visit janethartleonard.com.