Professor Adversity

Life lessons. We all have them.

We all have things in our lives that have taught us hard learned lessons. Often, those things are the things we thought were the worst things to ever happen to us. When we look back, sometimes we realize that maybe they were there to help us – to shape our lives in the direction meant for our path.

My greatest teacher in life has been lengthy adversity. I’m only recently able to look back on my life and really see that my lifelong disability has been my greatest teacher in life. It’s taught me empathy, patience, perseverance, how to cope with pain, how to fall and get back up again and again, how to live in the quiet and be content when the world around me is moving at a fast pace, how to appreciate the unique view from the sidelines, and how our hardships in life can be used to help others. It’s taught me that no matter how hard I wish something to go away, sometimes it just can’t. It’s taught me that if I fail at something or if something seems impossible, I can usually figure out a way around it. To never stop trying.

How can it be that the thing in my life that caused me deep frustration regularly, many days, months, and years of depression throughout my life, is the same thing that is now causing me to feel deep joy and so much happiness? I’m at a point in my life now that I can openly share my story, and in doing that, I’m reliving my journey and looking at it through a totally different perspective. It has been emotionally healing for me.

My kids really helped me to see how important it is to accept ourselves as we are. Somehow, seeing life through the lens of a mother really helped me to see my own life more clearly. During their hard times in life, my message to them is honest. Telling them that it won’t be their last challenge in life, and if they can see adversity as a teacher, it helps. Way easier said than done, right?

My oldest son was a distance runner in high school and went through a lot of really difficult times with tough injuries that really changed the story he had mapped out for himself. It was so hard to watch him live through those years, but on the other side of those injuries, have been some beautiful life moments. Watching him come to this realization was both painful and glorious. Crossing the New York City marathon finish line a couple years ago was as much a thing of beauty for him as it was for me. The fact that we did it together, which is a story for a later date, is remarkable.

It’s not to say we won’t still struggle when adversity comes our way, and it may take years to realize what it taught us. It takes humble courage to look at your life and realize that sometimes your hard times in life are your best teaching moments. I’ve seen many kids and young adults, who live with disabilities, come to this realization way before I ever did. I’m always just in awe, and so motivated when I see that. Motivated to keep pushing forward.

Until next time…

Amy Shinneman is a former National Ambassador for the Muscular Dystrophy Association, disability blogger, wife, and mom of two boys. You can find her blog at humblycourageous.com and reach her on Instagram @ashinneman.