Mrs. B

Some teachers change your life. For me, one of those teachers was my fourth-grade teacher, Mrs. B. She was one of a kind and is written in my book of favorite teachers at the top of the list, along with a few others.

Fourth grade, a time in a child’s life when they are starting to be one of the bigger kids in elementary school, not the top dog, but close! From the start, Mrs. B treated me differently. What I mean by that is that she did not treat me as Amy who was hindered by her disability, but Amy who had worth and value along with her disability.

She did not single me out, but she was exceptionally good at explaining to my classmates, my threshold, in a way that did not make me seem so different from them. Looking back, I now wonder if she had experience with a child like me before I came along. She just got things in a way others did not.

She gave me classroom jobs that worked for me and that helped me feel like I did not just have to sit on the sidelines, which was a frequent occurrence for me. When I was younger, and even now occasionally, those who do not know me assume that because I cannot do certain things, that means I cannot do anything. She saw in me that I was, in fact, a very capable human being. I could not get enough of her and the joy she brought to my life. We had a special connection, but the cool thing was that she had that connection with most of her students, if not all. Like I said, she was one of a kind!

My mom taught at this same school, and she knew Mrs. B. It was good for my parents to see me light up and be excited about school. I am guessing they saw a change in me that year, too. I felt happier and more hopeful.

There are times when, as a disabled person, it may take me longer to do a task than it would someone else. Just adapting to how to make it work for me, or trial and error, requires a lot of patience. Something I notice is that people often take that as I cannot do anything, and then they will just take over due to their impatience before I may even get a chance to explain myself.

It is not that disabled people are incapable, it is often society’s lack of understanding the situation or willingness to learn. I do not mean to sound harsh, but it is the truth. I have lived it my entire life, so I have felt that to be true and hear that from many others living with a disability.

A close friend of mine battled breast cancer recently. After one of her surgeries, she had to attend some school events for her children in a wheelchair. She sent me a text during and expressed how immediately isolated she felt. People looked at her differently or overlooked her. She felt frustrated. I appreciated her sharing that with me. It did not take her long to see things from that perspective and gain some understanding of all that comes with living disabled, whether it is permanent or temporary. Living disabled can be such an isolating experience, but it does not need to be.

I was lucky to have Mrs. B in my life. I have no doubt she changed the course of my life and the way that I viewed myself. I felt like I had something to offer. I was not just a kid to be stared at, mocked or underestimated. She lit a fire within me. It started as a slow burn, but I would say now it is a steady, glowing ember. It needs stoking from time to time to keep going, but the fire never completely goes out anymore.

Thank you to all the incredible teachers out there changing lives and instilling confidence in their students. To Mrs. B, you are one of my life’s heroes. Thank you for believing in me.

Until next time …

Amy Shinneman is a former National Ambassador for the Muscular Dystrophy Association, disability blogger, wife, and mom of two boys. You can find her blog at humblycourageous.com and reach her on Instagram @ashinneman.