Grandpa Howard often told me stories about other boys growing up. He noted one small boy began hollering repeatedly without any apparent cause and the noise disturbed Grandpa. When asked why he made such a racket he replied, “Because I’m alive.”
Toby was grandpa’s neighbor boy under school age. He liked to play with the children at Grandpa’s place and often stayed for dinner. He stayed so often that his mother finally threatened him if he ate another time without being invited.
This complicated the situation. Toby wanted to avoid punishment, and yet, if possible continue as before. When he came the following morning, he tried the tactics of a lawyer, using the adroit method of suggestion. He said, “I can’t stay for dinner today unless you invite me.” The invitation was forthcoming, and Toby stayed as usual.
Bert liked horses but was too young to be trusted alone with the team. When Grandpa was harrowing some plowed ground he wanted to drive a few rounds. Since the team was gentle and the field only about 40 rods long, Grandpa granted his request. Instead of driving the entire length as Grandpa had done, Bert turned around near the center of the field and was harrowing the opposite end. When Grandpa went across the field to correct the mistake (if it were a mistake) Bert said when he got that end done it would only take a little while to finish the other. Grandpa surmised his real object was to drive the team a few extra rounds.
Sam lived with his grandparents. Not having any boy in the family to play with the contrived various ways of self-entertainment. One of which was to take a stick, sharpen one end, place half of a corncob on it, then twirl the stick so the cob was thrown as directed. The target was likely to be any object within range. On a certain occasion his uncle happened to be the mark. Sam made a direct hit but he had personal reasons, afterwards, to wish that he had missed.
Walter was a slender lad and rather small for his age. He was neither quarrelsome nor cowardly. A much larger boy been teasing him on the school ground and Walter walked away to avoid trouble, but when the aggressor followed him, he turned and said, “If you don’t let me alone, I will go after you like a squirrel goes up a tree.” Then his fists flew with such telling effect that it ended further annoyance.
Paul was a precocious youngster whose studious and quiet manner belied his innate sense of humor. Grandpa was sitting on an open porch watching him try to drive his pet goat. After several unsuccessful attempts he fastened some tin cans to the rope that was attached to the goat’s collar. It required a little effort to get the goat started but when the cans rattled the goat began bleating and ran across the porch directly in front of Grandpa. When the boy’s father inquired what caused the excitement Paul replied, “I guess the goat got scared of the preacher.”
Yes, boys act the way they do because they are very much alive.