Articles by Scott Saalman

PODCAST INTRODUCTION: Ineptitude … Failure … Inanity … Stupidity … MURDER! … MURDER!! … MURDER!!! This is How I Broke This. SFX | CARTOONISH BROKEN SPRING: Boing. GUY: I’m Guy Razz,…

In 2013, I caught my first guitar pick. Rock ’n’ roll god Steve Miller tossed it from stage after his signature song, “The Joker.” You know: “I’m a joker, I’m…

The year ended with a near-miss cooking catastrophe. Fortunately, the Cubanos turned out fine, but there was a trio of little fires – figuratively speaking – to contend with during…

It is said “all dogs go to Heaven.” In the case of Skooder, our family pet many years ago, this saying had likely been put to the test. Those encountering…

…anyway it was 2012 and I was eating an $18 enchilada covered with green sauce – the enchilada was covered, not me – in the MGM Grand when the bartender…

In 2019 re-watched The Sopranos. All 86 episodes. My biggest binge. Just like last decade when it aired, I couldn’t get enough Tony Soprano. I knew I was in way…

Just like Dr. Victor Frankenstein, I created a monster, though I call mine “Scrabblestein.” I’m talking about my dad. In 2011, I introduced Dad to Scrabble, my splendid addiction. It…

Despite trying to attain the best possible return on investment regarding a ridiculous number of streaming services that I pay for, I somehow managed to actually open a few books…

As alluded to in a previous column, I just published a new collection of humor columns, Quietly Making Noise, which is now available to purchase on Amazon. Here is a…