From the Heart
Life is hard. This week was especially hard.
3:15 in the afternoon on Wednesday I checked in with my mom. She was fine.
4:30 the director of nursing at mom’s assisted living called to tell me that Mom had been unable to communicate as she sat with her friends at dinner. All she could say was, “Call Janet.”
911 was called and then me.
As I drove up Allisonville Road to 146th Street to River Road I found every red light, a line of rush hour traffic going nowhere and a fleet of gravel trucks moving at a snail’s pace.
Yes, I’m exaggerating, but I needed to get to my mother.
When I arrived at the hospital she was just getting back to her room in the ER after having a CT scan. A stroke was what they were looking for as her speech was garbled.
Looking into her eyes I saw her fear. I tried to hide mine.
She struggled to answer the doctor’s commands. He asked her, “What is your daughter’s name?” Silence. You could see her trying to answer as she looked at me. She just shook her head.
I kept reassuring her that she would be okay. I tried to reassure myself.
The hand that has always held so tightly to mine had grown weak, very weak.
I spent the night tucked into a hospital recliner. I said spent the night, not “slept” the night.
The IV alarm went off every time Mom moved her arm. As she would try to get out of the bed the alarm on the bed would go off. Respiratory therapy checked on her as she needed oxygen. About 3:00 a.m. a baby was born … Brahm’s lullaby announced it. Blood tests were needed at 5:00 a.m.
I will tell you that she got the absolute BEST of care. Knowing how much she was checked on meant so much to this trying to hold it together daughter. They even checked on me and got me blankets and pillows. I cannot begin to thank everyone who was part of her care. The staff at Riverview Hospital are such caring people.
I cannot express how much my heart smiled when Thursday afternoon I heard her say, “Janet, I’m hungry.” It was as if someone flipped a switch and everything was clicking and working.
The tests have not all come back and I have not spoken to the neurologist but it appears to be a TIA small stroke.
Friday evening she was moved to rehab. It’s a wait and see. It’s hoping and praying.
Life is hard. It will continue to get harder. I know that. My heart knows it. Mom knows it.
I struggle with writing about this chapter of my life.
I just cherish every day I can hear from my mom and hear her say, “Janet.”