A wise man once told me that everyone needs one…a Worry Tree.
Whenever you have something at work that is troubling you, he said, “Don’t take it home with you. Hang it up on the branches of the Worry Tree and leave them when you clock out.” You don’t get paid overtime because you take the worries home with you.
It is hard to do, especially when you are a people pleaser like I am. I want to fix it. I want to make it better. I want to do right by people.
And when I can’t? Ugh. I feel like I have failed. And of course, I feel like they don’t like me. Yes, I take it personally.
The wise man told me that if you do all that you can to take care of someone, that is what matters. Some will see it, some won’t.
Some people, well, you will never be able to please. You will have people that you go above and beyond what you should do for them and yet, it will never be enough.
I’ve spent many a night tossing and turning trying to find a way to make someone happy. For some people, happiness will never be found. They find faults that others would never see. They seem to carry a magnifying glass around with them. They hand you the magnifying glass and the weight of it burdens your mind and heart.
I have struggled to hang my worries on the Worry Tree. They get in my mind and as tired as I am, I cannot allow my mind to rest.
I’ve learned to respond to any concern as quickly as possible. The longer someone has to stew about something the harder it is to get them to understand that you are trying. Sometimes they just need to be reassured that you are aware of the issue and are trying to address it.
What if you cannot do anything to fix the problem? Apologize and move on. All you can do is your best. My least favorite saying is “it is what it is”.
Some people will never get over what you cannot solve. Some things are not for you to solve, try as you might.
Some people hold the measuring stick of satisfaction well beyond what you can jump over. Some people hand you hoop after hoop to jump through. You are ONE person. You have your limits. You do not hold the key to happiness for anyone but yourself.
The truth is that most people just want to know you care enough to try. They want to see that their concerns are addressed. They don’t want to hear the prepackaged word tracks that land on deaf ears. Apologies need to be sincere. Issues need to be addressed as quickly as possible.
At the end of the day, don’t wrestle with the issues of the day.
Ok, so my mind knows all this. I just wish my heart would listen.