By JANET HART LEONARD
From the Hart
Let’s meet for coffee. Come sit a spell with me on my back porch. Let’s take a walk and chat.
We are inviting people to share their thoughts, thoughts from their mind as well as their heart. An invitation for conversation.
Those are invitations for friendship. We are made for community. If COVID taught us anything, it is that we are designed to need connections. We see things differently when we have someone come alongside us. Their insight gives us a broader view.
I need my people. It takes a village to keep this gal sane.
Oh, the power of conversation.
Every heart needs a friend. When a heart hurts, the body, mind and soul hurt as well.
A hurting soul needs to voice its story. It’s part of the healing process.
I know that I can’t always solve the problem or issue that someone is dealing with, but I can listen. Sit, lean in and listen.
Until I know someone’s story, I cannot understand why they are the way they are. My mother always said there is a reason some people are funny-turned.
Listening with my heart is different than listening with my ears.
When I truly listen to someone, I am not thinking about what I am going to say next. I need to take the time to process what they have said before I speak. Even then, I don’t need to have a solution or an opinion. (Opinions can be dangerous.)
Sometimes I simply say, “I really don’t have an answer or a solution, but I understand you are hurting. I want to come along beside you and walk this hard part of your journey. I have not walked this same journey, but I have known hard places. I have dealt with difficult people as well as difficult situations.”
Life is hard. If someone looks as though they are living on a bed of roses … they have their thorns to deal with. Their grass may look greener but trust me, there are weeds among those blades of green.
I once had someone say to me, “I wish I had your life.” I almost choked. I was struggling through some difficult times. I realized after she made that comment that I had missed my calling. I should have been an actress. I had hidden my true life so well for such a long time. If only she knew, she would never have made that statement. She would have been thanking the good Lord above that she didn’t have my life.
There have been people who came alongside me and spoke kindness and caring into my life. They had the gift of encouragement. They saw behind the mask I wore. I will be forever grateful for their friendship. Some are still walking through life with me. We are still sharing conversations and a cup of coffee or glass of sweet tea.
Three powerful words: I’ve been there. Those people get it. They have known the feelings of hurt and discouragement. Some of them have a true gift of empathy. They gave me hope that life would get better … someday. And it did.
Leaning in and listening. There is power and healing in doing so.
Oh, the power of conversation. It begins with a simple invitation: Need coffee?