By AMY SHANKLAND
Sandwiched
I know it’s the middle of August and we’re still a few months away from Thanksgiving. But my heart has been overflowing with gratitude lately. I think many of us are blessed in the sandwich generation to have helpers. It’s important to step back and thank them often for what they do to ensure that our elderly relatives live their best possible lives – and that we stay sane as their caregivers.
I want to say thank you to:
- My brother, sister, husband, sons, niece, and nephew. You either help manage Mom’s finances and insurance, visit her as much as possible, lug her stuff around, and/or call often to check in on her. You also listen to my worries and fears about her. I truly never feel alone in this journey thanks to you.
- My friends who always ask me “How’s your mom?” You all never know how I’ll answer. Sometimes it’s a bright reply of “She’s having a good week!” Other times I have to fight back tears and a giant lump in my throat. But you keep asking and caring and it helps so much.
- Everyone at Mom’s assisted living facility. My family and I have discovered that no facility is perfect. But you folks are there day in and day out doing your best to help my mama. From the CNAs, to the dining room employees, to the nurses, to the maintenance and cleaning staff, to the receptionist (Patty, you’re THE BEST!) and the activities directors. The front office staff often works evenings and weekends. I see you, Ladies. I know you sacrifice so much.
- Mom’s palliative care nurse practitioner, Gigi. It’s been a relief to have you on Team Mama. You’ve gotten to know her these past few months and are working hard to manage her terrible arthritis pain and neuropathy. Not to mention monitoring the progression of her cancer. My family and I appreciate your weekly updates. You give us tremendous peace of mind.
- Mom’s oncologist, primary care doctor, and every other medical professional who has been so kind to her this year. You’ve amazed me with your caring attitude. I know these past 18 months have been an absolute nightmare for you. Yet you give Mom – and us – attention, information, and reassurance.
- The wonderful Hamilton County Express and Riverview Health Rides drivers. You help us take Mom not only to doctor’s appointments, but to get out and enjoy visits with family. I know not every county has an option like this and I am beyond thankful.
- Our Lady of Grace priests and volunteers who bring Mom communion. You help strengthen Mom’s spiritual life – the one that is most important. The love you bring to her each week is tremendous.
I am beyond fortunate to have these helpers in my life. You deserve more than just a column of thanks. May God bless you and be with you each and every day.