By AMY SHANKLAND
Sandwiched
I met a colleague last Thursday morning at Noble Coffee and Tea. I hadn’t seen this gal in a couple of years due to the pandemic. One of my team members was supposed to meet us.
I enjoyed catching up with my friend, but we soon began to worry. My teammate was 15 minutes late. When this happens, my mind has a funny habit of thinking that someone’s stranded in a ditch in the middle of nowhere. I called her and was relieved to hear her voice.
She was instantly embarrassed. She had completely forgotten about the meeting, but reassured me that she would be there in less than 20 minutes. I told her that it was okay and that I’d catch her up on what she missed later.
Do you know what my real thought was at that moment? It was “Thank God! She’s human.”
That may sound a little unusual. I’m embarrassed to admit that I used to be rather critical of people in my younger days. I was a bit spoiled and selfish growing up. I even had a college boyfriend tell me that.
But age brings wisdom, especially when you’re in the sandwich generation. I pride myself on being organized, especially with my schedule. I’m the Queen of Planning. But over the last 10 years, my responsibilities have grown. I’ve been working along with taking care of my family and my mother.
Most of the time, I can juggle all of the balls up in the air like a pro. Some days I feel energetic and confidently proclaim in my head “I’ve got this!” Others … well, I drop one of those balls … or two … or three.
I used to beat myself up regularly over those instances. Then one day, I read a phrase from Jen Sincero, author of numerous self-help books. She wrote, “You are not the Queen of Mistakes.”
I think I read Jen’s phrase 10 times that day. I felt something shift within me. Suddenly, I realized that all of my self-criticism over my mistakes was almost ridiculous.
You’ve heard it before – we all make mistakes. We’re human. We have to dust ourselves off, learn from them, and move on.
But we also need to extend grace to recognize that others make mistakes, too. Boy, is this hard. Especially with that guy who cut you off in traffic. Or the lady standing in the middle of the grocery aisle right in front of the item you need. Or the person who was late to your meeting.
However, I’ll bet you almost anything that if we think back, we’ve made the same error or something similar. We can only work to do better and hope that others can forgive us for these blunders.
Since I’ve adopted my new attitude, I find that I treat myself and other people better. It’s a more peaceful way to live knowing that we are not the Kings and Queens of Mistakes and a gentler way to exist in the sandwich generation.