Sandwiched
My 17-year-old son, Jacob, returned last Monday just after midnight from an incredible road trip to L.A. (Thank you to the Paullus family for such a great opportunity!) I couldn’t get up fast enough to give him a welcome home hug. We hadn’t seen him in 12 days, which is the longest I’ve ever been away from Jacob.
I definitely had my “blue” moments while he was gone. Jacob’s our energetic, outgoing, social son who always has friends over and shares funny stories with us. The house was way too quiet when he was gone and I began counting down the days and hours until his return!
I couldn’t help but think back to when I was just a bit older than Jacob going away to IU Bloomington for the first time as a freshman. At age 18, I was caught up in my nervousness and excitement about living four hours from home. I knew I’d miss my parents and that they’d miss me, but I figured we’d all adjust fairly quickly. I was ready for my independence!
My mother didn’t have the best move-in day experience, especially after another freshman said to me, “It’s so nice that your grandmother’s helping you.” She was referring to Mom, who already had a full head of gray hair at the time. Ouch.
And I’ll never forget the pull on my heart that day before Dad put his arm around Mom’s shoulders to lead her down the hallway for their drive home. Tears sprang to her eyes and we hugged tightly before saying goodbye.
Of course, I cried a little as well, but I soon got caught up in meeting new people and exploring my home for the next four years. Homesickness didn’t last long and I went on to enjoy four of the best years of my life.
As I look back on that time, I’m now more in my mother’s shoes. How on earth did she let go of her youngest child like that? Granted, I was able to either go home or host my parents for a visit at least every four to six weeks … but wow … four to six weeks! Jacob wasn’t even gone two weeks to L.A. and I was starting to go crazy.
Back then, all we could do to stay in touch was write good old-fashioned “snail mail” letters and talk on the phone once a week. You couldn’t email, text (gasp!) or FaceTime like what we do so easily today. I’m so grateful for today’s technology!
I’ve got a little more time before I become a true empty nester, as my oldest son Jonathon will be commuting to IUPUI this fall and Jacob will be a senior at NHS. But we’re already seeing less and less of them due to their jobs, school, their social activities and separate vacations like this L.A. trip.
I already know I’ll be relying on friends who have “been there, done that,” the Empty Nester section in the self-help aisle in a local bookstore, and lots of prayer when the official day comes.
And I can always look to my mom and so many others like her to remember that yes, life does go on, even when your babies fly away.