From the Heart
You know that thing about wisdom coming with age? It’s true, but it becomes a thing of beauty when a soul is bruised and broken and yet survives to tell about it.
After having been dragged through the fire of hurt, blown around in a tornado of confusion and thrown into an ocean of heartache, I have found a bit of wisdom.
And now what do I do with that wisdom? Honestly, I keep it tucked away and silenced until it is asked for and needed. And then I pray – a lot – whenever I am asked for it.
You see, my wisdom comes from my situations, my relationships and my heart.
Every situation is different. Every dysfunctional family is unique. Every relationship has its own set of circumstances.
The voice of wisdom does not tell anyone what needs to be done. It asks questions. It relates to what happened in its own situation. That voice can reassure, affirm and give hope.
The voice of wisdom knows when to speak up and when to be silent. It comes from the unique history of a soul.
What is right for one soul is not always right for another soul. We all hurt differently. We all can put up with stuff in our own time until we have reached our limit. Sometimes we are done and then we pick up the done and continue until we are DONE!
Never say to someone, “I would never put up with that, I would never allow that, I would never …” Everyone’s “never” is different. Should they never? Maybe. Should they be done? Absolutely. BUT it is not your decision. It is in the mind and heart of the one living their own unique life.
Is it frustrating to watch someone being hurt? Oh my goodness, yes. Does it break your heart to see the domino effect of the consequences of bad choices and bad behavior? Beyond a shadow of any doubt it absolutely tears away at the tenderest part of your heart.
And yet it is not our wisdom that makes the decision for others. It is theirs.
We can only come alongside those who are hurting and love them well. We can listen and then when asked we can simple say what is in our history. If we have not been there where they are, then the advice is not nearly as resounding.
Experience speaks to the heart of a fellow sufferer. It offers empathy because it knows the pain. It offers hope because it has survived. It is a great sounding board because it understands. Oh, the value of “been there, done that.”
Seek wisdom from those who have walked a similar path but know that the scenery and rough terrain are unique to the one walking it. Wisdom cannot hurry up someone.
Wisdom is gentle. Wisdom knows when to speak and when to be silent.
Sometimes wisdom is simply a gentle hug that reassures that the hurt will get better and the next steps will get easier.
Wisdom can offer the affirmation that it is okay to feel the way someone feels. It is okay to be confused.
Someday, yes, someday you will be able to help others in a similar circumstance and they will see that you survived so they can as well.
Someday your testimony will have a voice. There will be wisdom in that testimony.
Age and experience will bring you to a place where wisdom is found. There will be beauty in the ashes of shattered dreams and broken promises. Beauty takes on a whole different look. It is in the cracks and brokenness of a soul that has survived that true beauty is found.
Then you will know that wisdom, when shared, is meant … for such a time as this.