Meander: to wander aimlessly, without an urgent destination.
Ponder: to think quietly, deeply and soberly.
I embrace both.
This past week, I turned one year shy of being in my 70s. I turned the page to 69.
How did I get here so fast? It seems just yesterday I was 49.
On my birthday, I took a drive. There is something about September that beckons me to drive through the countryside. What is green now will soon change to the glorious colors of autumn. Hello fall!
Photo provided by Janet Hart Leonard
It’s on those backroads where I ponder about life and how I handle its challenges. So much of life is about what I choose to embrace. I am very cautious about where I allow my mind to dwell. Don’t get me started about where I allow my heart to dwell. Lessons learned.
- I embrace the moment and enjoy today for the simple things. I meander around an antique store and wonder about all the stories the antiques have to tell. I share a cup of coffee with a friend and let it get cold while we laugh at being goofy. The older I get, the more acceptable it is to be goofy.
- Slowing down, realizing I don’t have to be productive to make the day matter. Sometimes, I stop while on my walk and sit on one of the benches in my downtown. I love to people-watch. As a child, when I was bored, my mother would drive downtown, and we would sit in front of J.C. Penney or G.C. Murphy and watch the people. It was always a cure for my boredom. Now, it’s a respite from a frazzled day.
- I am realizing the joy of meandering. It’s not about reaching a destination but enjoying the trip to get there. I stop at places I never planned to visit, talk to people I never planned to meet, and carry on conversations that recharge my soul. Oh, and there’s the food I find at a cute, out-of-the-way place. Who doesn’t love an out-of-the-way café?
- I am embracing the wonder of nature. I pull over to catch the sunset and breathe a prayer of gratitude. My prayers are not laced with eloquent spiritual words but that of … God, You sure have painted a beautiful sunset with Your paintbrush. Thank You. I then take a deep breath and release the tension of the day.
- I have found the healing balm of pondering in a quiet place. If asked what I am doing, I reply … nothing. My mother would sit on her front porch and ponder. She said when I got older, I would understand. She was right. Pondering allows my mind, body, and soul to rest.
- I value conversations. I lean in and listen. I’m not thinking about what I am going to say next. I listen not only with my ears but also with my heart. I realize that people don’t always need to be “fixed” but need someone to listen to them. This is hard for a “fixer.”
- I capture a moment and write about it in my journal. I won’t always remember tomorrow what I thought was important today, so I write it down. Someday, my family will read my journals and maybe learn from my thoughts. My mother did just that. She is still teaching me in her writings.
- I am letting it go! What am I letting go of? I’ll go ahead and get my list. No, I’ll save it for another column … or two. I’m a work in progress in what I choose to let get to me … or who to let get to me. I guess you could say I am getting better at picking my poison. (Insert laugh.)
- And about those battles I choose to engage in – I have learned to choose wisely. Some battles are not for me. Just because I choose not to argue my point or side of the story does not mean the other person wins. Could you read that again? An argument takes two people. The loudest and the last to speak does not mean they win and I lose. I have fewer breaths to take in my life, and I’m not wasting any of them on petty stuff. If they think they win … so be it. I will not allow them to rob me of my peace. (That might be a work in progress.)
- Love well. I love people in the best ways I know how.
Where do you ponder? Where is your favorite place to meander? Please take my advice and learn to ponder and meander. You will find my mother was right – they are good for the body, mind, and soul.
Janet Hart Leonard can be contacted at janethartleonard@gmail.com or followed on Facebook or Instagram (@janethartleonard). Visit janethartleonard.com.