Surely, we can get away from the mental load when we go on vacation, right? Or through our hobbies … if we actually have those with all that is going on in life.
Yes and no.
Planning a vacation where you go away from home can take weeks of preparation, if not months. You must focus on transportation first. If you’re going by plane, train, or boat, you have to check prices often to book a fare that’s not an arm and a leg. If you travel by car, it’s important to get it checked over to make certain the tires and other components can safely handle the distance.
If you are traveling with others, you must communicate with them to go over schedules to pick potential dates that work for everyone. Once the dates and transportation are all settled, then you need to figure out who will take care of your home while you’re away.
Do you need a house sitter? Or can your next-door neighbor simply check on things for you every couple of days?
Then it’s time to budget your money accordingly and start your packing list. You’ll probably need to get items from the store or online such as sunscreen, toiletries, and maybe even a new bathing suit. Or maybe you’re going somewhere cold – not MY idea of a fun vacation but I know a lot of people love it – and you need long underwear, ski boots, etc.
If you have small children, you may need to get all the necessary gear ready such as a pack and play, traveling highchair, a “potty” seat, and so much more. Not to mention tons of diapers, wipes, blankets, burp cloths, extra clothes in case of blowout situations, and anything else you typically carry in a diaper bag.
Don’t forget everything you have to do beforehand at work to make certain the world will keep turning while you are away.
After you’re packed, ready to go, and finally on your way to a great time, that mental load still lingers on occasion. One of my girlfriends confessed to me once that it takes a good two to three days for her to finally stop thinking about work whenever she travels for a vacation. And this is someone who doesn’t check her work email or voicemail when she is out of the office!
Unfortunately, once we return from vacation, it can be way too easy for that mental labor to come crashing right back down on top of us. Unpacking and catching up on laundry, piles of mail, and work can make us wonder if going on vacation was worth it in the first place.
Hobbies are essentially mini vacations we can do more frequently. I love my hobbies and they are also terrific for escaping the mental load. But some of them require some planning and mental labor.
I enjoy walking 10Ks now every spring and fall. Of course, this requires preparation. I must schedule training walks each week on my calendar three weeks ahead of time for each race to make certain my body will be ready for six miles. I must also buy a new pair of shoes every year and check to see if other attire needs to be replaced.
I enjoy hoop dancing as well, which is essentially dancing with a hula hoop. I do this hobby either alone or with others. Once a week I hoop dance with other people, which requires scheduling time to meet up in a park, or working with a local venue so we can dance indoors during the colder months. Most of the time I can post all of this on social media, however, not everyone is on there and I must text certain people.
Sadly, we can’t truly escape the mental load 100 percent of the time with our vacations and hobbies, although they certainly help us get away from most of it.
Amy Shankland is a writer and fundraising professional living in Noblesville with her husband John, two sons, two dogs and a cat. You can reach her via email at amys@greenavenue.info.
Speaking of taking children on long trips and the items needed – this is why we waited until the children were much older to handle it – that is the adults.